Celebrating the heart with Najwa Zebian

This Valentine’s Day, we collaborated with author, Najwa Zebian, to honor the brave and tender experience of connecting with our hearts.

She wrote the beautiful acknowledgment above about the heroic work of being human through life’s heartache. In the interview below we talked Najwa about her inner journey, personal practices and wishes for the world.

Tell us about your relationship with yourself and how it’s shifted and changed over your life.

I have never been more at peace with myself and who I am than I am now. But it hasn't always been this way. I used to spend more time worrying about anything external to me and what it told me about myself, like the opinions of others, the judgment of others, what others thought was right or wrong. Now, I put myself first. I put my own wellbeing and wellness first. I take the time to understand my thoughts and feelings. I take the time to make my own decisions and choices about what I believe and what I don't. I take the time to draw the right boundaries for myself and to come from a place of worth, not powerlessness. 

How do you make time in your day to take care of your heart?

It starts the first moment I wake up.  Recently, I've been taking a few minutes to meditate in bed before I get up. I close my eyes and listen to what my heart is telling me. If it's a good feeling, I acknowledge it and honor it. I then ask it to stay with me. And if it's a bad feeling, I acknowledge it and where it's coming from, then I tell it that I will not follow it. That way, my day begins with an acknowledgment of how I'm feeling and a choice of how I want to feel. Throughout the day, I take time to check in with how I'm feeling. Silence is very important during this time because it allows for the voice within to speak. So I do exactly what I did in the morning and listen.

Do you have any practices that support your wellbeing? How do you take care of your mind?

I journal every day. I also frequently do hot yoga and at-home exercises. I have the Calm app on my phone and listen to meditative clips and stories as frequently as I can. I take care of my mind by making sure that I don't believe everything that my ego tells me. As you know, ego is the story that our mind tells us about ourselves. And many times, that story is not true, and it's meant to keep us in fear of living in the present moment. By being aware of my thoughts, instead of being my thoughts, I take care of my mind. All of these practices are incredibly important for me – not just for my own wellbeing but for my creative process as well.

Why did you want to collaborate with Calm?

Calm's mission and vision are what our world needs right now. The fact that every time I open the app, it reminds me to "take a deep breath" is exactly why I am convinced that this is probably one of the only apps that offers you an opportunity to connect with yourself. And that's the connection that, now more than ever, each and every one of us needs. We live in a time when the world is considered to be the most "connected" while ironically we are the most disconnected from ourselves (and others). Calm offers such an easy, simplified and facilitated way to take us back to what's really important; ourselves and our internal wellness. It reminds us to be connected with who we are so that we may be better people for ourselves first and then for the world – this directly aligns with my mission.

What's your wish for people reading?

I wish that any person reading this remembers that there is no expectation right now for how they should be feeling or thinking... that where they are now is valid, because that's what it is. There is no point in looking at ourselves with judgment or comparison to what we should be or where we should be. The only way to see the change that we want within ourselves is to start with where we are, not where we think we should be. 

What's something that you wish someone would have told you ten years ago?

I wish that someone told me that I was okay as I am. That I was enough as I am. I often hear people saying things like "it will get better" and that bothers me to hear because it infers that the present moment is not enough... that the present you is not enough. And how can you fully be yourself and allow yourself to shine if you believe that the way you are in the moment is not enough? I wish that someone told me that I was enough, without needing to prove myself in any way to prove that to myself or to anyone.

About Najwa 

Najwa Zebian is a Lebanese-Canadian activist, author, speaker, and educator. Her passion for language was evident from a young age, as she delved into Arabic poetry and novels. The search for a home—what Najwa describes as a place where the soul and heart feel at peace—was central to her early years. When she arrived in Canada at the age of sixteen, she felt unstable and adrift in an unfamiliar place. Nevertheless, she completed her education, and went on to become a high school teacher, where she spoke at multiple schools about poetry, diversity, inclusion, education, equity, culture and more. She has a Bachelor in Education, Masters in Education and is currently a Doctorate in Educational Leadership candidate, on leave from teaching. Her first students, a group of young refugees, led her back to her original passion: writing.  She began to heal her sixteen-year-old self by writing to heal her students.  

Since self-publishing her first collection of poetry and prose in 2016, Najwa has become an inspiration to millions of people worldwide and a trailblazing voice for women everywhere - name dropped by the New York Times, The Huffington Post, and CBS News, among others. 

Najwa’s unique journey of breaking out of the mold that society and culture suffocated her with has been an inspiration to millions worldwide—many of which have chosen to have her words tattooed on their bodies. Her ability to articulate soul-deep feelings is what sets her apart from the rest of the world; that uniqueness coupled with her extensive knowledge on educational pedagogy and teaching in a manner that effectively educates makes her a powerhouse in the field. Through her three books, her podcast (Stories of the Soul) and her own digital school (Soul Academy), she continues to give a voice to countless souls out there aching to be heard.